Sick and All Wigged Out

Note to self: Let’s actually post to the blog instead of playing with the settings, shall we? Quit being the lazy dog and lose this “theraputic distraction” excuse.

First off, I’m sick and I’m fucking sick of being sick. Since a week ago Friday, I’ve had some nasty head cold that was rebranded as a sinus infection this morning by Mel who pointed out that a cold would have probably gone away by now. And that it hasn’t moved to my chest and I don’t have a cough. Nope, I’m just a major fuzzhead that can’t breathe and have gone through an entire box of tissues. My face actually hurts! Drugs have made me a semi-functional zombie… This week I managed to get to work three days, work from home two days, go to two doctor’s appointments, make a lasagna, do some laundry, hem two pair of pants, and supervise the handyman making some repairs. (I was suprised he didn’t run screaming, as I’m obviously diseased.)

My Valentine’s Day started out lousy and ended up nice. This was predictable, since I had a doctor’s appointment in the morning but had planned to stay home in the evening and make a nice dinner for my sweetie instead of going out to my usual Wednesday night game night.

At the doctor’s office I had an MRI on my head and neck. I can’t describe to you how fun this was: You try to not cough, sneeze or sniffle when you’re sick because you have to hold your head perfectly still. For a full 45 minutes. Good thing I had doped up sufficiently before they shoved me in there.

The MRI results were inconclusive. Inconclusive in this case meant that positive results weren’t apparent to the Doc, who reviewed them directly afterwards. He has to wait for the full report from the MRI expert. In the meantime, more tests have been ordered because the hunt for MS is still on. Since there’s no direct test for it, it’s a process of elimination. It’s a good thing Mel was with me Wednesday because it’s all too much to absorb quickly enough for me to fire back important questions like “How long will it take to get a dianosis one way or the other?” Well, at the point one of these tests hits a positive you have it. But get this: A negative diagnosis could take up to a year. That’s some shit, eh? The only way they can declare negative is with comparative MRIs that have adequate time between them to be certain there’s no changes.

The second half of Valentine’s Day was much nicer. We had a nice lunch at a Mexican restaurant and then shopped for dinner fixin’s. I made a banging lasagna for dinner which we had with a nice bottle of wine. After that, I was pretty much zombified. It was an exhausting day and the cold meds and wine did me in. Mel’s got another “snuggle” raincheck to add to her pile. 😉

By Friday evening I worked up enough nerve to visit the National MS Society web site. I was intrigued that the doctor had said that Buffalo area was one of the “hotspots” in the world for MS and wanted to find out more, generally and about this area in particular.

I read the detail of each of the listed symptoms and finally, fully realized why the doctor was pursuing this testing. I have now and/or have had in the last 8 years about 75% of the symptoms listed. Some of them individually might be attributed to being fat, sedentary, 43 and peri-menopausal. But collectively? Holy shit. It’s got me thinking the doctor is not on the wild goose chase I thought he was was.

I didn’t find anything specific about this area online but two of the people – one with MS – I’d mentioned it to had both heard about the prevalence of the disease in this region. The doctor had asked if I was born and raised here, mentioning that the likelihood for getting MS is higher if you spent the first 12 years of your life here. The guess is heavy industry is the cause. Even if you’re not from here, you might know what the words Love Canal and Hooker Chemical mean. Not to mention all the steel, automotive, plastics, chemical and rubber manufacturing. I have a friend who worked for the New York DEC who contracted a form of leukemia after visiting a toxic waste site for cleanup evaluation.

So now I wait and see. Do the tests. Try-not-to-wig-out-more-than-I-am-already.


  1. Geez. It’s time for all of us to quit our jobs, move to a clean, mountain area with a clean water source and just fucking live off the land. We need to decompress and de-toxify.

    I hope all the tests turn out negative. Get your sinuses cleaned out and you probably won’t be off balance any more. 🙂

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