Lazy Dog Public House

I’ve been running around like a chicken-with-my-head-cut-off trying to get ready for this trip. I’ve bought luggage because what I had wasn’t large enough. I bought a new digital camera. (I would have done that anyway since I sold the house.) I’ve bought gifts, returned them and bought other gifts. I bought travelers checks, both in Euro and Pound Sterling. I’ve bought toiletries. I bought genealogy software, among other things, for my Handspring Visor so that I could have that info handy on my visit. I bought a contemporary German phrasebook for travelers - I call it contemporary because it included swear words. And because it made me laugh until I cried while sitting on the floor at Barnes & Noble, I also bought Wicked German for the Traveler. It’s a hilarious little book that includes German phrases for most of your travel activities including (some samples):

*beer hall small talk/beer connoisseurship/states of inebriation
- Now you’ve crossed the line, you bag of Schnitzel.
- You can taste the eggs beneath the vigorous schnauzer.
- Touching the barmaid without permission.
- Would you help me carry my friend?

*food and drink
- You have an unconscious wish that I eat your sauerkraut.
- Naturally, I would enjoy a piece of your strudel.
- The bill seems remarkably high for noodles/potatoes/cabbage/organ meats.

*a trip to the butcher
- Which animal was this?
- Which part?
- Please just point to the place on your own body.
- Hmmm… that doesn’t look very tasty/heathful.
- Did I mention that I’ve decided to become a vegetarian?

More later, shopping is exhausting.

Hey, wait a minute… Hat jemand gefurzt? Chari, was that you?